Present in time.

Not enough of it.  Too much of it.  Where does it go?  
Goes faster in the flow.  Pauses in moments of love.  Flies when you're having fun. 
Quit wasting my time.  Make the most of your time.  How much time is left? 


I have an interesting relationship with this 4 letter word.  Interesting in a sense where I value time greatly as it's amount is unknown and never promised yet I still forget could run any time....

Around this time 5 years ago, Steve, began his long journey towards an ALS diagnosis.  I will never forget the weeks that led up to the official diagnoses (happened in August); the ups and downs, the emotions, fears, times of pause, time flying, time dragging in doctors offices inspecting their faces for answers, waiting times for doctors appointments, times spent on the internet googling symptoms and self diagnosing, times trying to forget there's even a problem,...

It wasn't all negative because Steve and I were newly in love, I had already made up my mind that even if it was something awful, I wasn't going anywhere.  Four months was enough time, in this circumstance, to know he was the one.  

I have a new perspective on time because of Steve, and it's value, yet I still find myself snapping at people, "You're wasting my time," instead of fully giving of it to those who need it, or I find myself "wasting it" by spending too much of it, reading about other people's time.  


I have come to believe that truly learning how to best spend this luxury of time, is the most important lesson one will learn. 

Maybe the first step of this, is this appreciation of it I have.  Until you can appreciate it, how can you manage it properly?  

It's time, for a commitment, to time.  To proper use, proper management, and proper presence.

Proper presence.  To truly be present in all situations makes for enough time, great use of time, and peace with however much time is left.