Instead of tearing down, I want to build up.

What if we build each other up?

I have this thing where I write about every ex after a break up, to try to download all the lessons, I've included small pieces of vague references in my book, which happens Steve’s favorite part. It's very insightful, that type of insight I hope to reflect through the whole book.  Yesterday while editing, I read something an ex said to me, and it sparked this blog. 

He said, “ You know people are going to think you're fake because you're always complimenting everyone.”

"Well that's a silly thing to say." I replied, both of us surprised because I didn't speak up much in these days, and I even continued, “ If you really look you can find something good in everyone, why wouldn't you tell them what good you see? If you can't do that maybe you need to look in the mirror.”

Apparently he didn't want to do that, as he did me the biggest favor of my life by ending our relationship.

I never truly processed this until I felt the power I receive from Steve when he builds me up.  He's been building me up since day 1 and it's because of the way he sees me that I've ever been able to do anything that I have for him. From the first time ALS showed it's true colors, and I proclaimed, "I don't know what to do," Steve was there to tell me, "You're smart, you're strong, and you're creative; I know you'll help me figure this out."  Learning each new stage, when he would sense I was nervous he would remind me with a smile, "I trust you with my life."  He has never seen me as anything but capable, intelligent, loving, etc and by him holding me in this space, I became stronger and more powerful than I could have ever imagined.

Now imagine if we all did that for just one person (or more if you can muster it.) Damn the positive power we could generate.  It's not hard really, you just look at the person and say, "Did you know you are really kind, smart, creative, caring, whimsical, magical, healing, funny, talented, capable,...." Don't stop reminding them, even when they can see it for themselves; because the type of power we can cultivate by helping people see the good in them, is stronger than any negative force around.